This is my old blog. My new addy is...

WWW.SERIOUSLYSHELLIE.COM

Breaking up

I loved you
you were good to me
well except for the time I tried to switch my blog name
and then my old blog name turned into a russian porn site
and people still didn't have the links changed
and they thought I was taking my Russian obsession a little far

I've outgrown blogger. I need more options. I'm sorry baby its time for me to go. Time for me to move on with my blog. so I found wordpress. and I formed a new blog. I'm sorry adventures
*please leave my toothbrush on the tire. bye.


P.S.
wanna see my new hair color? come check it out here.


P.S.

make sure to update your link to me. I am now switching my blog over to a .com site

www.seriouslyshellie.com

*quote from "The Office" in case you didn't know. Angela said it to Dwight when they broke up. because he killed her cat Sprinkles by stuffing it in the freezer.

just one of those days

today is just one of those days where I want to flip off the world and yell "bite me" as loud as I can.

and its all due to the fact that I dyed my hair this morning
and now I look like this....




it didn't help that I also dyed my eyebrows and they look like two black mustaches above each eye!

I'm going to try wearing my glasses today to church to cover up my eyebrows. hopefully it works.

last one I swear! well at least for a really long time

I did get to MAKE A WISH while I had cancer. A whole crew came in and transformed my bedroom into a pink and white fantasy wrapped in cotton candy. It was awesome!

but that's not what this is going to be about.

This is about my original Make A Wish wish that I now know why they couldn't grant it... but at the time it really broke my heart.

When I was diagnosed with cancer we lived in Rigby Idaho. Primary Children's Medical Center was located in Salt Lake City Utah. So every week my mom and I would make the trek to Utah. It's a 3 hour drive. And if any of you have driven from Rigby to Salt Lake you know the area... its mostly just hills and fields.

My favorite memories are driving down to Utah with my mom.

I'd make a nest in the backseat with pillows and quilts and some stuffed animals. (before the days that seat belts were cool... well at least in Idaho they still hadn't caught on yet)

I could sleep, I could read, we'd stop at a truck stop for some drinks and gas, we'd sing songs on the radio, we'd play car games. It was so much fun just hanging out with my mom.

I felt good, I wasn't in pain, I wasn't throwing up, I wasn't getting needles stuck in me, and I wasn't dragging around an I.V. pole. and the funny thing is in the car, riding down to the hospital, it didn't feel like anything bad was going to happen to me. it was like the calm before the storm.

And my favorite thing to do driving down... was day dream. I had this one major day dream that just kept going and going and every time we made that trip it got bigger and bigger.

It started when someone from Make A Wish contacted us and told me that they were going to grant a wish for me. They gave me a couple of weeks to think about it and that someone would come to the house to meet me. Well I couldn't believe it and from that moment on I had one wish and one wish only.

To have a horse.

I know I know...girls love horses... big deal. No, I mean having a horse was like my truest desire in all my heart. I read about horses, I dreamt about them, I walked out in the fields behind our house just to look at neighbors horses. My sister and I even cleaned out an old barn behind our house and stocked it with carrots to try to catch our own horse.

So driving down to Utah I'd look out the window and just daydream about my horse. Not like daydream and think

"hmm I wonder what my horse will look like or hmm what will I name my horse?"

I would totally envision myself riding the horse on the hills and the fields we were passing.

I'd be sitting tall and wearing a pair of dark jeans, a white button down shirt with those riding boots over my jeans. you know those english boots? and I had really long hair that was all flowy like. oh and I totally envisioned myself older like 18... (hey when you are 13 being older was like really cool :)

so as we were driving I'd look out the window and see myself ... the older... cooler... prettier version (with long flowy hair) , riding this amazing horse. Sometimes the horse was black, sometimes brown, but most of the time I envisioned her as a palomino. :) and I'd see this girl looking so beautiful and so happy that it made me feel so happy and gave me a lot of hope.

Sometimes when we got to the top of a pass I'd look out and see her on a mountain top farther up the way... she'd be waiting at the top looking back at me and motion for me to follow. Then.... the horse would do some cool thing... like in Man from Snowy River and rear back and prance her front hooves in the air!!!! Oh man even thinking about it gives me chills :)

And I totally would want to wave back at her.

I'm here!!!

I can see you too!!!

I'll be you soon!!!
As soon as I get my wish :)

So then Make A Wish contacted us and we had a meeting. I remember sitting across from this lady and she said,

"Shellie we want to grant you one wish. What wish do you want to come true"

My heart felt like it was going to explode!

Here goes... in one breath it came out...

"A horse!"

and her face that was all smiley just seconds before... fell. She tried to recover, put her smiley face back on while nodding, but in that instant I knew.

I would never get a horse.

"Well... we'll have to see about that... I don't know if that one is possible honey. Is there anything else... Disneyland, a cruise?"

no.
nothing.
that was my only wish.


I kept it together though, I didn't cry, and I didn't act sad.

"Yeah Disneyland... hmmm how about this... what about that..." we all went around with different ideas. and finally I put the idea out for a room makeover because I thought it would be fun. and it was

the next drive to Utah wasn't as fun...
but the thing is that day dream was still so strong that I still saw it.
I can still see it.

and it still does give me hope :)

Chapter 2

So I'm going to start writing a book its going to be called

Klassy Kids get Kancer

JK

I really hate when things are spelled lame like that.

like

Qwik Stop

or

Kute Kutz


I mean really? Like do you really think that spelling it different is going to bring value to your business, and make you stand out and be memorable? Really?


But for real maybe I should write a book. But I'd have to get an illustrator. So Jessie B. are you cool with that? I'll give you like 10 bucks.

So with out further ado... here's chapter Two.

Eyeballs keep falling out of my Head

One day I started a chemo treatment. I have no idea what in the world it was called. but it did have this symbol on every bag.







I remember it was so strong (I think they scraped off some scum from a pond at Cherynoble for it) that they had to diffuse it over I think a week? For that one round. Because if not I'd be swiss cheese and whistle when I walk.

One of the side effects was that it would burn your eyeballs, make them shrivel up and fall out of your head.
The only cure... a special eye drop (that also kinda burned!!!) that had to be placed every 2 hrs. on the dot.

So during the day... for a week... every 2 hrs my nurse would come in. This particular nurse I'll never forget. Her name was Paige and she was a RAUNCH. Seriously. I think she hated me and I pretty much hated her. That's kinda weird to hear I bet. I mean people who are in the Nursing field are usually really loving caring people... especially if you are a pediatric nurse... who are working with termial kids. I wish I had enough guts back then to say to her
"Don't Hate, Appreciate" or something like that. I really don't know what her deal was... but she always gave me the dirtiest looks.

So anyway... every 2 hrs I'd be sitting there with my head tilted back, eyes open, she'd walk in, she drip the drops in, she'd walk out. we wouldn't even talk to each other most times.

Well one day she wasn't there. Come to find out she had traded shifts with the night nurse. Which really sucked to find out because nights were really hard to go through during these specific chemo rounds...

I'd get to sleep only to be woken up every 2 hrs to put the drops in so I wouldn't be blind, then it would burn and make me want to scratch my eyes out, and then I'd have to lie there and wait for the burning to go away... and try to fall back asleep... only to be woken up again!

My night nurses were always cool. One was a lady whose name I don't remember but she loved Labrador dogs. She had lab coffee mugs, lab watch, lab scrubs, lab calander (but oddly she didn't even own a lab!) (jk she did I think 3 of them)
Well whenever she woke me up she'd be all sweet about it...
"Shellie honey... wake up..." and she rub my arms or my bald head until I gently arose.

So when I found out Paige was working that shift I was like Oh man! tonight is going to suck hard core. because I knew there wasn't going to be any "shellie honey wake up" it was going to be "Shellie! its time for your drops" or something like that. But then almost immediatly a light bulb went off...

I knew the perfect way to get even.

I went to bed at 10 p.m. before she started her shift. I laid in bed with the covers pulled over me for 2 hrs.

waiting

waiting

waiting


Then I heard the door open.

I could sense light from the hallway coming in but other than that it was pitch black.

I could hear her coming closer and then she was unscrewing the top off the eyedrops and placing it on the side table.

Right when she was about to lift the blankets back

I sprung up and yelled
"Aaaahhhhhh" like right in her face.

she jumped and screamed and ran out of the room.

and then I laid there so happy... I couldn't even laugh or anything. Seriously one of the proudest moments of my life.

and she never came back in for the rest of the night to give me my eyedrops. its a miracle they didn't shrivel up and fall out of my head :)

Poop Song (with new picture)

oh yeah you know its going to be a good one when the title of the post is
"poop song" yay!

so remember when I started that tradition where at any random time I'd post something embarrassing that happened to me.

well guess what Its that time again. everyone get ready....

You know with all this talk now I've GOT TO DELIVER!!! Crap Balls. The PRESSURE!!!

FREEEEEDOM!!!

I love to throw some Braveheart into Dramatic situations. :)


so ya'll know I had cancer right? You know thinking about it I don't play my cancer card enough... I should probably think of some ways I can get stuff from that. :)
Maybe I'll write a book like Lance Armstrong or something. just a thought... seriously though... if I wrote a book would you buy it?
what if it came with a photo section???

So just so you know the upcoming words are going to be in this post... just in case you want to stop reading. If you do stop reading I will find out!... exactly in the same way how I found out who VOTED NO in my little "Will you go out with me" poll!!!

Bowel Movement
Poop
Constipation
Laxative
Enema
Hot Doctor
Shellie

But they are ALL used in a medical way. If you use any sort of bad word in a medical way you are cleared.

So one day I was at Primary Children's for another round of Chemo. (by the way one of the reasons I would love to write a book for kids with cancer is because when I found out I was going to be given chemo I thought I would be strapped in a chair and a room would be filled with gas. Seriously. How TERRIFYING is that!!! so I would love to write something to show what to expect on a kid level)


So back to my story...

I was laying in bed. I was watching some movie. Probably Free Willy or something. and in walks my nurse.

"Shellie have you been able to go to the bathroom lately?"

"yeah"

"No Shellie have you been able to take a bowel movement?"

"Yeah" (uhhh no... how did she know!!!)

"I don't think you have. Is your stomach hurting you?"

"nope I'm fine"

".... Okay... well I'll check up on you soon!'

She leaves and I turn up my volume on my bed right at the part where the whale jumps over the kid and that Micheal Jackson song comes on...
FREEEDOM!

Then like 10 minutes later she comes back in... with my Dr... and another dude who is a Doctor? And he's hot...and young... and in scrubs. (if you ever want to improve your looks get into a pair of scrubs... its a universal truth they make you hotter)

So they are standing there all looking at me.
My Dr is like
"Shellie we think you are constipated from the chemo"

My eyes get really big and my mouth hangs open. Oh my gosh did he just say "constipated"? I feel my face get really red.


"Uh no I'm fine"


"Shellie its okay... it happens when you are on such strong medication. It throws systems out of sync sometimes"

"This is Dr. Hotty. He's a resident here. He would like to check you out. Is that okay with you" Says my evil Dr.

Dr. Hotty smiles at me. Oh my gosh I'm in LOVE...

Oh geez I can tell this is some how going to end very bad. very very bad.

Dr. Hotty walks over to me.

"Hi Shellie, I'm Dr. Hotty, I'm wearing scrubs, Did I mention I am really good looking?" Flashes me amazing smile "Would it be okay if I touch your stomach and see whats going on?"

Oh my gosh this is not happening to me.

"uh okay"

Dr. Hotty rubs his hands together and blows on them to warm them up.

I am going to pass out.

I lift up my shirt and he starts massaging my stomach.

"Hmmm... yes.... just what we thought"

"You've got a lot of poop in there. You are constipated"

Please dear lord take me now. I want to die. Seriously! Take ME NOW!

I didn't even know what to say. I think I blacked out or something.

Then he steps back and starts singing (HONEST! I am NOT EXAGGERATING ON THIS PART AT ALL)

"You've got some poop in there and you need to get it out. Poop poop poop! Poop Poop Poop."

OH MY GOSH! I HAVE FIGURED IT OUT..... I HAVE DIED... I AM IN HELL!!!

I seriously didn't know what to do... I looked for my nurse. Please help me... save me from this embarrassment!!!!

"Shellie how about we give you a laxative to drink and if nothing happens we'll have to give you an enema." says evil Nurse

"okay" anything just get Dr. Hotty out of here.

they leave.

Nurse comes back in with two bottles of laxative.

I chug them like I'm at a bar in some chugging contest.

"Shellie I'll need to see your Bowel Movement"

"Just you or the Dr's too?"

"Just me"

oh thank goodness!

So yes the laxative did work. it was the smallest squirrel poop you ever did see but I didn't have to get an enema by Dr. Hotty

THE END

Guest Blogging

I'm over at Shan's blog today while she's on vacay in Mehico!

Come see what's up and get to know Shannon by reading her previous posts. she's one cool chicka!

Sugar High

Since I've been on this diet I keep asking Chad how something tastes when he's eating something good. Like the other night he was eating an ice cream cone.

How does it taste?

Really good.

Like how good?

Really really good.

Oh man!

So now I want to live vicariously through you guys. Please leave a comment on something really yummy you ate recently and how good it tasted.

Thank you. You will be rewarded in Heaven.

tonight I wanna cry

if you ever want to cry for no reason.

this show usually does the trick

Six Years

Tomorrow Chad and I celebrate 6 years of holy matrimony. Here's some pictures from the past couple of years in somewhat of a random order. Also the song is the the song of our first dance as husband and wife!